We might apply the idea of a “messy middle” to much of life–switching careers, engaging in social change, even parenting/family life itself. Most of our lives happen in this space, when you stop to think about it–we haven’t yet “arrived” at the metaphorical place of organization and tranquility, but are constantly evolving our processes to be responsive to needs. How might we help our children understand the messy middle–its necessity, its tension, its gift–in a developmentally-appropriate way?
As parents and caregivers, you likely know all too well the daily stressors you face. The surgeon general’s report outlines the specific challenges we face at each stage of a child’s development, from sleepless nights with newborns to navigating the troubled teen years. The stress doesn’t just affect us as parents, it spreads to impact the whole family unit. And when we worry that our stress is affecting our kids, the cycle feels never-ending. The surgeon general’s report calls attention to this vicious cycle and offers actionable ways to break it.
In today's fast-paced information cycle, issues are often presented as black or white, right or wrong. When parents actively listen and support diverse perspectives on various topics, from child care to nutrition, they model for children how to understand and appreciate differences, encouraging a more nuanced and empathetic view of the world.
Mental health experts recommend helping young people build an understanding over time of what they can and can’t control. Bringing the focus to “how we treat other people; what activities we do the next day; what goals we have; who we spend time with; how hard we try to do the best we can” is something we can start in middle childhood to build a strong frame of reference in adolescence.
Buckling up for a metaphorical bumpy ride from time to time as you enter a new job, experience a change in leadership, or encounter a developmental growth spurt is something that begins at birth and follows us until life’s conclusion. The winds of change blow strong. With children, we sometimes don’t see the changes themselves right away; instead, we see the impact of the changes in personal barometers of behavior and mood. How can we as supportive humans respond effectively to the need for change and see the purpose behind the disequilibrium?
As adults, we have a better sense of what is within our locus of control and how we can approach solving problems from our mature perspective, whereas young children see a lot of problems as big and insurmountable even if they are not. The good news is that we can cultivate the growth of our child’s sense of helpfulness over time in ways that match their developmental stage, while teaching about both agency AND the interconnectedness of humanity.
Research shows that families who co-create mission statements and continually revisit their shared values feel more connection to one another and a sense of responsibility to others. It also aligns with the values of families who are Doing Good Together! Does this sound like something you and your family would like to try? Here are some tips to encourage you in writing a mission statement that reflects your family’s values and centers your efforts to identify and continually practice your family’s mission.
As the month turns, many of us find ourselves entering a time of year that is busy, busy, busy–with both regular daily and seasonal activities filling our calendars. Family pursuits such as athletics, the arts, and other skill-building pastimes intermingle with daily rituals of school, work, and keeping a household running smoothly. There are also many holidays observed around the world in the coming months and families add rituals surrounding these days to their already-full dockets. We get busier with the preparation of special meals shared with family and friends, the selection and giving of gifts, the travel plans that require time, and financial resources to bring families together. As a parent, I often find this season to be, well, A LOT. Here are some ideas for families looking to stay connected to presence/mindfulness in the busy months ahead.
At times, my now-teenagers had a great capacity to step into the shoes of another; but at other times, I felt that despite my best efforts, empathy was lacking. I also noticed that their empathy skills developed differently, despite having the same parents and upbringing. How did what came so young and so naturally for one child seem so challenging for another?
Self-care may conjure visions of bubble baths and movie nights (two creature comforts I fully embrace), but there is lots of evidence that a few intentional wellness strategies can help us feel great even in the midst of chaos. These five strategies can help you cultivate your whole family’s sense of well-being.
At Doing Good Together, we help families start and sustain an intentional “ kindness practice,” a powerful combination of daily habits, big-hearted conversations, great books, and volunteer experiences. Starting - and sustaining - an intentional kindness practice with your busy family is easier than you’d think. Here are the tools to get you started!
At Doing Good Together™ we love to find ways to make a difference, not occasionally, but regularly, as part of the hobbies and habits we already pursue. Here are four easy ways you and your little one can make a difference with this summer's family vegetable garden and three essential reasons to make gardening your favorite family hobby!
For nearly fifteen years Doing Good Together has connected parents with essential tools to open a thoughtful dialogue with their kids. We've seen time and again that by reflecting on our experiences, volunteer efforts, and everyday interactions, children develop strong skills in compassion and problem-solving.
